How to Avoid Becoming a Deadbeat Dad

According to the dictionary, a deadbeat is someone who avoids paying his debts. This term is most often applied to dads. I have never heard of a deadbeat mom; though I know they exist.
In another article I wrote about what makes a deadbeat dad. After writing that article I received some emails asking if I would address how a dad could avoid becoming a deadbeat in the first place. I will try to answer that question to the best of my ability in this article.
In my opinion, deadbeat dads are about the lowest form of life on the planet... right below pond scum. I have very little use for a man who will check out of his kid's life and fail to offer the encouragement, support, and love that they need. I am of course talking about a man who does so by choice. I fully realize that there are some men who are forcibly kept from their children as a result of a nasty divorce. For those men I have only sympathy.
However, since the purpose of this article is to discuss how a man, under normal circumstances, can avoid becoming a deadbeat; let me offer the following suggestions:

• Be engaged in the life of your kids at every stage of development. Kids need their fathers. Even infants need the sound and touch of their dads. When you decide to wait until your kids are older to get involved, you are abandoning them at this stage. Get engaged in the delivery room and make it a lifelong habit.


• Decided to pay your debts. Remember that a deadbeat is someone who doesn't pay their debts. There are some things a kid has a right to expect from his Dad. Keep your word. Your promises are a form of debt. You gave your word as a promissory note. Keep it! There is nothing worse than for a kid to get the idea that Dad doesn't keep his word.


• Keep a strong relationship with your children's mother. One of the biggest causes that men walk out on their kids is divorce. Sometimes the best thing you can do for you kids is to ship them off to a dependable babysitter and spend some time cultivating a healthy relationship with their mother. You will be more apt to stay in the kids lives if you stay in their mom's life. A healthy marriage is important. Your children depend on it.


• Affirm your love constantly. Often kids begin to feel that they are unimportant to their dads simply because he fails to affirm his love for them. Get over your hesitancy at saying "I Love You." Grow up! Say the words. Your kids need to hear it. They want to hear it. What is more, they deserve to hear it. Deadbeat dads seldom tell their kids that they love them.


• Make your kids a priority on purpose. There are some times when spending time with your kids will interfere with work. Let it. You can always get another job. You only have one chance with your kids. I realize that you cannot just ignore your boss. I am not asking you to do that. I am simply suggesting that if you want to avoid being a deadbeat, you should make your children more of a priority in your life.

Did I miss something? Did you have a dad that made you feel special? I would love to hear about it!

Are you a man looking for how to be a better dad? For more articles on Dad's visit my website http://www.howtobeadadtoday.com

 

By Mark W Foster
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7662452